I took a little time thinking about what I wanted my first post of the new year to be. Did I want to rattle off resolutions that by March will only serve to make me think of myself as a failure? Or did I want to be the anti-resolutionist, and avoid being specific in my goal setting so I can let myself off the hook for bad behavior?
Truth is, I am resolved. Resolved to change my life, for the better, one day at a time. To achieve this, I DO have specific goals. The first goal is to love myself more. My next goal is to share my courage and laughter. I have an abundance of each. After that, I want to radiate positivity and surround myself with positive people. I want to grow toward the light. Be the light. Be in the light. I want to LOVE.
Do I want to lose weight. HELL to the YES! But I have lost weight only to find more as I back-stepped out of change and into the me I knew and recognized and loathed. This will only work if I embrace the new me. The new me can go out to a restaurant and be social and make new friends and not eat if she’s not hungry. I did that today. The self I am becoming, she can eat chicken wings and pizza in moderation, and not stuff her face as if she’ll never she food again in this lifetime. I did that today. I don’t know her, this person I am becoming, but she seems like a pretty cool chick: smart, and funny, and talented, and compassionate. I don’t know her, but I choose to love her anyway.
So in the new year I plan to make new choices, try new things, be braver, and count it all a blessing. The measure of success is simply a blog post here in about 365 days. In short, my resolution is to show up, and meet myself on the journey.
This is me answering the call.
Thank you for reading.